


What the night brought to my window

by dat_oasis



Series: Killugon week 2020 [1]
Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Aged-Up Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck, Fluff, Gon misses Killua, Light Angst, M/M, Mom friend Kurapika, killugon week 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-05
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:41:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24019945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dat_oasis/pseuds/dat_oasis
Summary: The distant waves of the ocean calmed him, yet the streaming tears did not stop. Gon cried out in pain. His chest ached so much. The tired nightingale in him was lonely. Each and every day it's songs would go unnoticed. At some point, even Gon would forget that there was something on the left side of his chest. Something that brought him life and left him on the endless path of each and every day.ora short fic for the killugon 2020 week!
Relationships: Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck
Series: Killugon week 2020 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1731154
Comments: 2
Kudos: 40





	What the night brought to my window

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Glad you decided to read this. In all honesty this might be one of my favorite works I've written. Before you start reading i must let you know a few things
> 
> 1\. Gon and Killua are both 15 in this story  
> 2\. I suggest you listen to "Reprise/Again" from Spirited Away, "So ist es immer" from Attack On Titan and "Promise of The World" from Howl's Moving Castle. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it.

"Zuuuushi!" A loud shout echoed through the house. "What do you want Gon?!" A reply shot past the paper-thin walls. "Where did you put the cookies?" Gon's lips formed into a sheepish smile as angry footsteps neared him. "I swear to god," Zushi mumbled pinching the bridge of his nose. "Are you blind?!" The shorter boy's voice broke down. "They're literally on the shelf!" Zushi grumbled pointing to a shelf by the tv. "Ohhhhh, thanks Zush," Gon chuckled softly slowly getting up to reach for the cookies. 

"Are you finally ready to play just dance or do I have to annoy you even more?" The dark-haired boy spoke through a mouth full of chocolate chip cookies. "First of all, chew before you speak. Second of all, yes I'm good to go," Zushi murmured settling down by Gon. The taller boy shuffled over to his console and put on 'Just Dance'. "If we're not doing Apple Bottom Jeans as the first song I'm officially no longer your friend," Zushi stated before shoving a whole cookie into his mouth. "Yes yes. I'm no fool, this is our damn theme song," Gon placed his right hand to his chest, acting out some strange kind of despair. 

Zushi got up and brushed the crumbs off of his pants. Gon shuffled up to his side and the two started dancing, singing along to the song with wide smiles and giggles bubbling inside both of them.

**\-------**

It was around noon now, aunt Mito was at work just out of town so that meant Zushi and Gon had to make food for themselves. Gon had suggested to go pick berries in the forest and eat them with milk, but Zushi was too tired from the 'Just Dance' frenzy they had gone through the morning.

Now the two were in the midst of making chocolate cupcakes for dinner and lunch 'cause when two 15-year-olds have the freedom to eat anything they absolutely always eat cupcakes, plus two points if they're homemade. 

The whole time Zushi was preparing the ingredients Gon was having a whole concert on the dinner table, which meant he kept rapping Eminem's Rap God and Godzilla the entire time.

"I swear to god if you don't shut up I will throw an egg at you," Zushi grumbled quietly. Right at this exact moment, he was rethinking his entire life and the decisions he had made to end up in such a spot. "Come help me ya dingus," The short boy's eyes narrowed as he watched his friend slip down from the table. "Alright alright, calm down," Gon chuckled softly, ruffling Zushi's hair and snapping his last piece of sanity at the same time.

"Jesus fucking Christ, go do shit like this to Killua 'cause I'm about to lose it," Zushi murmured under his breath hoping Gon wouldn't hear it, but unfortunately the idiot did and immediately shut up. Zushi was a very nice friend but at times he couldn't deal with Gon's annoying and loud attitude. He would sometimes question how Killua managed to deal with him all those times on their adventures.

Zushi sighed softly before grabbing his phone, connecting it to the speaker the stood on the fridge and starting to play Comethazine. Gon immediately, as if on instinct had started to sway along to the music, head-bopping here and there. 

Sometimes Zushi would question why so suddenly Gon started liking rap music that leaned to the more aggressive side, such a music taste didn't really fit him but fit a certain someone. The short boy would always come to the conclusion that the loud and fast bars would remind Gon of Killua. For the short time that Zushi got to hang around Killua, he had taken notice that the white-haired boy was like a storm. Sometimes he would be loud and violent, sometimes he would get very quiet and flustered just like a rap song. The verses were calmer and slower, just like Killua when he was shy and the choruses were fast and aggressive just like whenever Killua lost all control. 

_A strange comparison, yet it somehow worked._

**\-------**

It was now the evening. Zushi was getting ready to leave. He and Wing had to get to Yorknew in a few days so they were starting to pack up their stuff in Whale island. 

"I'm going to miss you man," Gon whined, his mouth was full of the cupcakes the two had baked earlier. "Me too," Zushi chuckled as he pulled on his jacket, already set out for the door. "Remember to call me okay?" Gon bit his lip. 

He was very bad at saying goodbye. It had been a good few years since he last said goodbye for a very long time. "Don't worry, I won't go completely missing," Zushi chuckled, a tinge of bitterness stuck to his tongue like honey. Gon only nodded, his sad eyes trailed Zushi as he stepped outside, waving back to Gon. "See you in Yorknew!" Zushi smiled softly, trying to ease Gon's aching heart. "Mhm, I'll stop by to visit!" Gon smiled, yet it didn't reach his eyes. 

Zushi turned away, he couldn't bear to look at those lonely eyes. They practically begged for even the slightest affection. Zushi could not offer him any, he knew it would all be worthless as Gon's still chasing. He's still chasing the highs and lows, he's still chasing after Killua's scent. 

Zushi waved, yet he did not dare to look back. He just kept on walking forward.

Gon shut the door tightly. Aunt Mito had left him to his own freedom until the late night. It was the eve of his 16th birthday yet aunt Mito had work set for her. She apologized many many times the entire morning. Gon didn't mind her leaving him to himself, he was actually very thankful. 

He could not bear having her see him break down on such a nice day. He was glad the house was empty for once in a while. He finally got to cry in peace and eat cupcakes. 

Gon dragged his feet to the kitchen, grabbing what was left of the cupcakes after the entire day. He retreated to the living room, draped a thick blanket around himself, and put on some calm music. 

Tears streamed down his cheeks without even letting him cuddle up on the couch. The loneliness made his bones ache, it hurt to miss someone so much. It wasn't nice to get reminded of them every single day. Gon wished he could forget all those magical adventures he and Killua shared. He sometimes wanted to turn back time and never meet his friends. Sometimes he wanted to just go back to being a kid in the rye fields chasing butterflies and getting lost in cornfields. He wished he could be a simple fisherman, providing to the island's needs. 

Now his old dreams felt so distant. It felt as if they didn't even belong to him. 

The distant waves of the ocean calmed him, yet the streaming tears did not stop. Gon cried out in pain. His chest ached so much. The tired nightingale in him was lonely. Each and every day it's songs would go unnoticed. At some point, even Gon would forget that there was something on the left side of his chest. Something that brought him life and left him on the endless path of each and every day. 

His mind kept replaying Killua saying his name. Whether it was a happy moment or some distant sadness he remembered everything. It was not nice. His heart swelled with fondness each and every time he would see Killua's smile replay, yet his bones grew tired as he realized there will never be such things.

He and Killua promised to stay in touch. At first, they really did, they'd call each other almost every hour, growing lonely without each other's warmth. In the passing months, they grew distant and busy. They could no longer call each other whenever they'd please. And soon enough, Killua went completely silent.

He remembers his very last conversation with Killua. Back then he had no idea that it would be their last conversation. He didn't even get to thank Killua for all those times. For all those adventures the two had taken on. He didn't get to hug Killua for the last time. He wasn't able to get his feelings out there. His heart ached. The little bird inside of him sang sadly, its voice was giving up.

_And so he sat there, listening to echoes of the waves through an open window. Tears streaming down his face and the emptiness at his heart grew even colder._

**\--------**

The silent house fell into a strangely comforting slumber as the sun started setting behind the horizon. Gon had been crying for a while, to the point where no tears had been left for him to shed. He was still hurting yet the clouds had passed away for now. His tired legs barely had any strength to them, so when the phone started buzzing loudly and he had to get up he almost fell to the wooden floor. It took a bit of time so after a good few rings Gon could finally make his way to the kitchen and pick up the phone right before the person could finally hang up.

He had not looked at the caller ID so it came as a pleasant surprise when he heard Kurapika talking over the phone. "Gon!" Kurapika's voice was cheery and bright forcing Gon's tired eyes to shoot open. "Hey, Kurapika," The dark-haired boy's voice was groggy and tired. "Happy birthday my boy!" Gon smiled softly as Leorio's screeching in the background hit his ears. "Leorio!" Kurapika hissed at the lanky man. Even though Gon could not see what was going on he could imagine the scenery. 

"Argh get off me!" Kurapika shouted. Muffled giggles came from the other side of the line as Gon listened to their playful bicker. "I'm sorry Gon. That head-ass almost spilled his tea on my brand new shirt," Kurapika sighed as a defeated cry was heard from Leorio. Gon mustered up a chuckle. It was unnatural, such things usually made him talkative yet he had no energy for that. "We wanted to celebrate your birthday with you.." Kurapika trailed off, he was tired too. Gon could tell.

"It's okay," Gon mustered up to bring out what was left of his energy before he would break down into a crying fit again. "I know how important the mission is for you," He murmured, he didn't feel any of the words he said. Was he being selfish? His friends have their own lives, he needs to respect that. Inevitably one day they'll be separated by time. It's no mystery.

"-On? Gon? Gon?" Kurapika nervously repeated the boy's name. "O ya! Sorry I spaced out for a bit," Gon chuckled stiffly. After a long and tiresome pause, Kurapika spoke again. "Gon, are you sure you're okay?" His words rang with concern yet they brought Gon only more loneliness. "Yeah," He mumbled. "Just been thinking," He sighed softly. 

"Gon, I know you miss him," Suddenly Leorio spoke up. "It's going to be okay," His voice was calming. "You have us and can always tell us whenever you're feeling like this,". Such words brought whatever his body could muster up as tears to his eyes. How could he be so foolish to think that he shouldn't have met these wonderful people? Deep down in his heart, the nightingale sang a pretty song, such one he hadn't heard in years. 

"Thank you," Gon's voice was shaky. He knew he had to get this off his chest. So he did. He kept Kurapika and Leorio on the phone for a good few hours, talking to them about anything and everything. He shared what he and Zushi had done over the past month, Leorio told Gon about his patients and Kurapika shared stories of his enemies.

**\--------**

It was 11 pm. The church bells had rang not too long ago and Gon was getting ready to sleep. He did his usual routine, brushed his teeth, and got ready. The boy was still too energized to sleep even if he had been doing lots of stuff most of the day. Gon quietly opened the window. There was a festival today that's why aunt Mito was still working her head off. 

Gon listened to the distant music, the cicadas' calls accompanied it. He lit up a candle and placed it in a lantern that stood by the opened window. Gon always liked watching moths gather around. He always liked watching the candle flicker. Speaking of moths there were already a ton of them there. Strange various bugs had sought the light. 

Gon's body had started sway to the rhythm of a calm song. He could imagine the people dancing in the wide square. Kids and elderly all paired up, dancing to the tune. The lonely bird in his heart chirped a sorrowful song as he imagined Killua standing right in front of him, arms tucked one Gon's waist, eyes full of stars. He danced in the room with the memory of Killua by his side. A sad thing, yes but it helped Gon calm down.

_"May I join in?"_

A sudden new voice rang in the room. Gon immediately turned to the window.

It can't be.

The familiar warmth of the playful tone rummaged through Gon's memories. A wide smile set on his face. "Am I this lonely that I can now hear his voice?" He spoke aloud, chuckling sadly as he stared up at the ceiling. 

Warm hands enveloped Gon's sides. "You idiot, I'm real," fluffy white hair tickled Gon's neck as Killua pressed his face into the boy's back as if he held on for his dear life. Tears streamed down Gon's face as he turned to face his dear friend. "Killua-" Gon choked on his own emotions. He hugged the other boy back just as tight.

Killua's fingers rang through Gon's hair as the boy cried into the other's shoulder. This moment felt like magic. After such long years, after so many changes Killua was by his side. He was here. Gon's tears streamed down his cheeks shamelessly making his face look swollen.

Killua slowly swayed his body to the sound of the bittersweet tune. It was a simple thing yet it calmed Gon down. He still couldn't grasp that Killua showed up so suddenly. The little bird in his heart was in shock, its wings were beating at the bars of its cage with excitement. Killua slightly pulled away, just enough for him to see Gon's watery eyes.

Just like in Gon's memories, Killua's eyes were like a lake in the night. There were stars, full constellations dancing in his blue gaze as it trailed Gon's features. Killua leaned in and placed a tiny kiss on the dark-haired boy's nose.

"I love you and I promise you that I'm never ever leaving again,"


End file.
